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Denise Witmer
Denise's Parenting Teens Blog

By Denise Witmer, About.com Guide to Parenting Teens

Online Shopping for Teens Saves Time for Parents

Friday November 27, 2009
Shopping for your teen can make you nervous about facing all of the holiday crowds, finding the right gift, your budget, etc. But parents, you can get your teen to help! Have them tell you what they want and then just order what you need online. For years, I've been using this time-saving trick. I still shop in stores for the fun of it at Christmas, but it is stress-free, because what I need is already purchased.

Here is how: Have your teen create a wish list and give them the responsibility to find the item in online stores, trying to get the best price. Then use their wish list to shop. Be sure to tell your teen what your budget is, but that they can put what they want on the list. This is also very handy if you have relatives who are looking to buy for your teen. Just email your teen's list to them. One wish list I recommend is Amazon.com's wish list area.

Suggested Resources:

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Thrifty Thursday: Snacks for Teens, Waste Not, Want Not

Thursday November 26, 2009
I have found the best way to save money on snacks for teens is twofold: change them up and put them out. The thing you want to avoid is having your teen comb the entire kitchen and then exclaim, "There's nothing to eat!" when you have full cabinets and the refrigerator is overflowing.

First, purchase different snacks each week, this will keep your teen interested in the food available. I'll use bananas as an example from my home. If I buy them every week, there will come a time that I have bananas going brown and no one will touch them. But when we go for a week without them, my teens wonder if we will be getting them again soon, and they don't waste them when we do.

Second, food needs to be ready to eat. When teens are hungry, an unprepared fruit salad isn't what they'll grab. But if the fruit is cut up and just needs to be scooped out, they will do it. And if it is in the bowl ready for them when they walk in the door from school, all the better.

Some Fun Recipes:

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How To Set Up a Car-pool for Youth Group Events

Tuesday November 24, 2009
Is your teen's youth group doing any caroling this year? Maybe just heading out to the local light show? Are you trying to pull together a car pool of teenagers? It's crazy! Lucky for you I've done this quite a few times and although I'm not promising you won't get a little nuts, these tips should help.

Parenting Poll: How much money do you give your teen for Christmas shopping?

Friday November 20, 2009
My daughter has a very part time job this year, therefore she has been able to save some money for Christmas shopping. After counting it up and seeing what she would like to buy her sisters and her friends, she realizes that she may not have enough. She then started looking for sales and has not - yet - asked for more money from me. The thing is, I'm not sure how much money I'm willing to give. I'm sure after talking to her I'll know better what she needs, but as a ballpark figure, I don't know. My feelings are that I was willing to give her more last year, but why should she be penalized for having a job and saving some money? I'm going to have to think about this. While I do, let's get a pulse from our parenting community with a poll - and don't forget to leave your opinion in the comments area!

Poll: How much money do you give your teen for Christmas shopping?

See the poll results.

Do You Still Give Hugs to Your Teen?

Thursday November 19, 2009
And does your teen still let you hug them? I went to hug my 13 year old today in the grocery store because she was sad about losing a basketball game and she looked like she needed it. She backed away and looked up and down the aisle, making sure no one was there before she let me hug her.

Do you think I should have told her about the cameras stores use to keep shoplifters at bay? lol

So, fess up! Do you have to sneak in a hug or two with your teen or do they let you hug them any old time? And how important do you think hugs are?

Share on the your stories, advice and opinions in the comments area.

The Teenagers of the Mayflower

Tuesday November 17, 2009
You can easily get your teen involved in history by digging up facts that he/she would be interested in. Since the US Thanksgiving holiday is coming up, I'll use it as an example. Below I have listed some facts about some of the teenagers who crossed the Atlantic on the Mayflower. Arm yourself with them and have a good old fashioned conversation at dinner tonight.

Screening Quiz: Is your teen depressed?

Monday November 16, 2009
When your teen seems moody or sad, do you think its depression or it's just a phase? Believe it or not, depression is more common than we realize. According to a national study conducted by the Centers for Disease Control, 61 percent of 8th to 10th graders reported feeling sad and hopeless, 36 percent reported nothing to look forward to, and 34 percent expressed serious thoughts of committing suicide. Scary to think about!

It's important that parents not only think about it, but talk to our teens about it too. Talking to teens can make them feel less hopeless and help them understand or work through whatever problems they face. It will put you on your teen's side - which is right where you want to stay.

Related Resources:

Mom Asks: Opinions on Alternative Schools?

Friday November 13, 2009
A mom on the forum asks: My 15 year old son has decided that if he skips enough school and fails enough classes, he will GET to go to an alternative school. He has several "friends" that attend, and I think he thinks it is the easy way out ("it's a shorter day and they don't care if you skip!", his words). I think ALC's provide an excellent opportunity for students that really need them, don't misunderstand. I just get the feeling my son is just being lazy, and wants more time to "play".

He does deal with ADD; trouble staying on task, staying organized, and being overwhelmed with workload. However, he goes to a wonderful school, and they are willing to work with him, he's just given up. When I say that, I mean, he is consciously skipping, and just won't do his work. He can do it, he is just not willing to put the time in. I fear he is manipulating to get what he wants, when he is doing fine where he is, if he would just stay put, and put forth a little effort. If he were really trying, and not skipping, and still struggling, I would have a different opinion.

I guess my position is, do I let him try alternative school to see if it might be a better fit for him, or do I continue to struggle with him on homework, staying in school, and failing? I want his education to be positive for him, but on the other hand, I want him to learn sometimes we need to push through something difficult to become stronger.

Denise's thoughts: It sounds to me like maybe getting him something to dream about that is bigger and better than alternative school might work. He sounds like he is not having a good experience school when he is there and he searching for something better and showing you by skipping school. Maybe you can help him find something he is good at and promote him doing it, instead of changing his school for discipline reasons? For example, does he like mechanics or would he like to try to work on cars? If so, enroll him in night fix-it classes or find a garage that needs a helper. Once teens are engaged in something they enjoy and that can help build their confidence, school and other responsibilities become easier.

Asking our community: What are your thoughts? Please share your advice and opinions in the comments area.

Too Much Food in Teens' Diet Is What Is Causing Obesity

Thursday November 12, 2009
Time has reported on a new study out that blames obesity in teens more on food consumption then exercise, although it does concede that it is a combination of the two factors. Most writers just talked about how food is the culprit according to the study. That is not what it says at all. Here are some of the facts as stated in the Time.com article about the change of physical activity:

"But the survey also found that teens' overall rate of daily exercise had not changed much since 1991, when the study sample was first asked to report their participation in gym classes in school and their level of physical activity at home. The percentage of teens attending daily gym class has stayed relatively steady since 1991; on average, the yearly change in the proportion of students participating was less than 1%. The percentage of ninth- through 12th-graders getting adequate levels of moderate physical activity -- exercise such as slow bicycling, fast walking or pushing a lawn mower, which did not make participants break a sweat -- also changed very little, from 26.7% in 1999 to 26.5% in 2005"

I was just thinking about this recently. My middle daughter is playing basketball. On the days that she practices, she comes home and eats a good meal with a smile. On the days that she doesn't, she picks at her food and snacks the rest of the night on junk food. I came to the conclusion that organized sports and activities really are the best way to get teens exercising and eating right.

Asking our community: Why do you think schools offer physical activity opportunities only for kids who have the talent to entertain with sports games and not just as activities for all teens to promote good health? Do you think the tide will change anytime soon? Please share your thoughts in the comments area.

More: Quiz: Are you raising a healthy teen?

Thrifty Thursday: Check Out Clearance Racks with Your Teens

Thursday November 12, 2009
My aunt said something about her twin 18-year-old daughters recently that I found to be true of my own daughter - and I never noticed. She said, "When my girls enter a store at the mall, they make a bee line right for the clearance rack first." So does my oldest and she always manages to find the best deals there for clothes that she can wear that day. It seems the clearance racks aren't just for the past season's stuff anymore.

Does your teen check out the clearance items in their favorite stores? Do you? Please share your stories, opinions and advice in our comments area.

More: Thrifty Tips for Families | Five First-rate Opportunities to Talk Money Sense with Your Teen

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