Cyberbully Is a Real Problem for Online Teens
Thursday August 9, 2007
Have you talked to your teen about cyberbullying? I’m going to be making it a point to mention it to my family in the next couple of days after reading this article on ZDNET.com. Here are the statistics the article gives:
"15 percent of teenagers state that they have had private e-mail, instant messages or text messages forwarded or posted without permission; 13 percent claim that they have had rumors spread about them online; 13 percent have received a threatening or aggressive e-mail, instant message or text message; 6 percent have had embarrassing photos of them posted online without consent; and 32 percent fall within in at least one of the four foregoing categories."
And here is another fact from the article that gave me pause:
"While there is much concern these days about threats to teens online, an interesting aspect of the memo is that 67 percent of teens say that bullying happens more offline than online, and only 29 percent state that bullying is more likely to happen online."Has any of this happened to your teen? How did your family handle it? Did your teen talk to you about it or did you find out secondhand? I really do not want my teens to take a hit to their self-esteem in this way and I have to wonder if there isn’t more we can do to prepare them for this type of bullying. Do you have any ideas to share?
My 16 yo DD was bullied during our summer break by so called friends from school. She blocked their messages and tried to ignore them but it brought her to tears more than once.
In the six months since they have all resolved their differences and are cautiously friends again.
Recently our local police force spoke to the senior students about cyber bullying and my daughter was amazed that she could have had these people charged with harrassment under Australian Law.
Perhaps teens need to know what laws and consequences follow this type of behaviour.
Sharon in Australia
Hello Denise,
Thank you for the resource. I reposted an excerpt from your article on our blog as I feel my audience would greatly benefit from the contents. http://www.thinking-forward.com
Regards,
Joe Bruzzese
My DD was exposed to this last year.
I did some research and discovered that Oregon Law does not yet cover Cyber Bullying…but that the School District Discipline Handbook and the Harassment laws could be applied, since the bullying was horrible at school and mild online.
I sent emails to the principle with examples and citations and told them I expected them to cover with students what constituted cyber bullying and bullying in their Health class or an assembly.
I found out that it was covered, but the teacher believed the kids doing the bullying when they said it never happens here.
But I’ve been told by other parents in the school that the bullying has been this way in this small town for over 30 years. Go figure. If I’d known the climate of the school, I never would have moved my children here.
What an important topic to address. I’m a counseling psychologist and work with Qwest Communications to help families surf safer and smarter on the Internet. You’ve asked what we can do to prepare teens to handle online bullying; this article from the Qwest Online Safety Classroom specifically addresses how parents and teens can handle cyberbullying http://www.incredibleinternet.com/index.php/do/get_page/pageID/148.
The most common reason teens don’t tell parents about harassment or bullying online is they are afraid you will get angry and take away their Internet privileges. Resist the temptation to automatically cut them off from the Internet. Instead, choose the assertive responses outlined in the article above, that deal directly with the problem rather than the delivery medium.
Here’s something else to think about: One of the big differences in online and offline harassment and bullying is that some of the teens that are the targets offline become the perpetrators online. They feel safer and more anonymous, and have tech tools that can spread hurtful messages instantly and widely. This gives them a new sense of power to get back at people who may have made fun of them, ostracized them or been mean to them in other ways at school. Parents and guardians need to be aware of this, and help their teen become citizens who treat others with respect, both online and offline. To learn more about how to talk to teens about online safety and cyberbullying, I encourage you to visit IncredibleInternet.com.
Linda Young PhD
Some people have the guts to cause grief to someone through cyberworld since they are confident that the victim won’t know who the caused it.