Any parents of graduating seniors out there?

Well, my boyfriends, son lives with us and he is a senior this year. Wow, theres alot of things going on and its all new to us. So and helpful hints are greatly appreciated! When should we order grad. invites and get them in the mail?

Hi Jennifer, I would call the school and find out what vendor they are using for announcements/invites and how long it takes to order them. Also, ask how many tickets you will be able to get for the graduation itself, they can be limited. I have articles on announcements and a party planner, you can find links to them here: http://parentingteens.about.com/lr/graduation/195514/1/

Hi!

I can definitely relate to you. my son is graduating and he is so busy and I don’t get to see him that much. he has an extended lunch somedays and actually comes home and we have lunch together or we go to a nearby cafe. sometimes i think I have too much to do yet I realize I will never have this time again so I need to savor it and let the laundry sit sometimes. After all, they want your attention and time.

It’s scary/crazy having a senior! The senior picture proof book is still on the table waiting to be ordered from… the pile of possible scholarships to do is still growing next to the computer… he’s involved in everything at school (one last time) so we’re always running to an event… but he’s already chosen a college, so we’re dealing with all of that. It’s challenging to juggle it all, as parents and as a senior! He’s excited to be going off to school – talking to new friends he met this summer at a college camp and that he’ll be seeing again at college… but, yet, I know he’s scared that it will be too hard and he’ll be over his head… and that he’ll miss his girlfriend like crazy. Like someone said earlier… about letting the laundry sit… when he wants to talk, we talk. It’s usually late at night when he’s on his way to bed – maybe because he knows I’m mentally already half asleep so I won’t ask soooo many questions!! lol! There are so many things to do and get ready… so many scholarships need the FAFSA before you can do them – and just reading about that makes my eyes cross! Is it really as bad to fill out as I’ve heard? Once we get our taxes done, it looks like it should be fairly easy to just get numbers for the FAFSA off of the tax stuff… UG!! Ok, done rambling, I need more coffee and chocolate to deal with it all!!

I know from personal experience that when a child leaves for college, it’s quite a life transition. Even though you knew it was coming for a long time, one day it just hits you very suddenly.

One day when our son was in his last semester of high school, it struck me how our lives would be changed when he’s gone. I asked myself how to tell him everything we wanted to say. Since I’m a musician, I found it easier to put these feelings into music, and wrote this song:

You once small
Now stand tall
It has been so incredible watching it all

As you go
Our love will be with you…
(c)2006 Lee Liebner

Other parents somehow heard the song and asked me to make it available to them to give to their kids. To make a long story short, the song eventually became a whole graduation present in the form of a combination book, song-on-CD, and scrapbook called “As You Go.”
The basic message of the song is we love you, we believe in you, and we wish you well.

I have to tell you a funny story. While we were at a graduation party for seniors and their parents, one of our son’s classmates standing next to me in the buffet line told me “You’re on my iPod.” I quickly moved to see what I was stepping on, but she told me “No, no, your song is on my iPod!”

Everyone’s remarks sounds familiar and that is what helps me deal with the crazy busy year with my daughter who is a Senior…sharing my similar experiences with other parents going through the same thing.

One thing to add is the total disbelief that my daughter is a Senior in high school. You know it is coming all of these years but when it does, it hardly seems real.

The remarks about our kids wanting to talk to us and usually at the most inconvenient times made me laugh. I really make an effort to listen to her now even if she doesn’t seem to care she is interrupting because there won’t be as many of these moments when she goes off to college. And yes, I sit there thinking about what I need to be cleaning sometimes instead of listening to her…what is it about women and cleaning?

As far as the FAFSA thing, check with your child’s high school. I work at one and many of them have group FAFSA fill out sessions for kids/parents or will help you with the process.

And a word to the wise…kids often tell me at my high school that they wish I was their mom and I also say to them “You wouldn’t be saying that if I actually was your Mom!!!” Our kids know that we love them more than anyone else but if my daughter is like any of yours, she sure isn’t very warm and fuzzy when she is around which is not much these days.

Good luck to all of us!

Claudia, your comment about the kids not being around much reminds me that your daughter sounds like she’s on a very healthy path to independence, just like you raised her to be, so you can be very proud of that.

One thing to get ready for is “senioritis,” when these basically very good kids act out in ways that seem very foreign and unrecognizable at the time. Just another part of the process.

I once read a great description of this time that is very true senior year: “Adolescence is like a house on moving day.” I love that description. You recognize all the stuff, it’s just appears very discombobulated and unsettled at the moment. You know that one day it will all become very recognizable again. It’s just another part of “the freedom dance.” If this is your first time experiencing this, there’s a slight temptation to take it personally, but it’s really all about them at this stage of the game. Try to clamp down on their freedom too tight right now and they’ll express it even more. My daughter and I really butted heads in her final semester, but now, long after I gave her a big hug and acknowledged her freedom to create her own life, that’s all she wanted and is doing fantastic now that she’s on the other side of this hump, and she’s more loveable than ever. If I had been wiser back then, I would have seen that just trusting in her would have been the greatest form of love I could have shown her at that point, because that attitude of trust tells her “I know you can handle it.”