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Is Beer Pong at 18-Year-Old Birthday Party a Good Idea? This Father of a Teen Wants to Know

By January 27, 2012

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Quick Links: Alcohol Use by Teens

A Dad on our forum: "My Daughter is turning 18 next month. She wants to have beer pong at her party. We've been on vacation where I allowed her to have a few drinks. From time to time I'll let her have a sip. We have also had (many) talks about the dangers of alcohol. My parents absolutely prohibited me from drinking when I was a teenager and in rebellion I drank anyway and it became a long time problem. I don't want to make a "big deal" about it, like my parents did, but I am concerned about the consequences if I decide to let her have the beer pong...both moral and legal... Let's set aside the law for minute and responsibility if someone get injured.

What are your thoughts from a moral perspective on underage drinking?"

Denise's thoughts: "Morally, you may not allow other teens to drink - it's not your right. Are you going to call every parent of each teen who comes to this party and let them in on the fact that they will be allowed to not only drink but drink to access playing games such as beer pong?

You cannot set aside the law for minute and the responsibility if someone gets injured because both are very real. Allowing your daughter to drink alcohol">alcohol in your presence is legal in most states, maybe all? But allowing her to get drunk is child neglect.

Don't go to the other extreme because your parents were too strict. You can still have a great relationship with your daughter, but you have to be her parent, not her friend or you are going to lose her respect. "

Asking our community of parents of teens: Would you let your teen host a party were beer pong was being played? Would you allow your teen to attend a party with that type of drinking? Please share your advice, experiences and opinions in the comments area.

Quick Links: Alcohol Use by Teens

Comments
January 27, 2012 at 11:19 am
(1) kat says:

Dad,
You’re kidding, right? Just because you don’t want to be overly strict, you’re going to a)break the law and b)put a bunch of teen-agers at risk of OUI, alchol poisoning, unprotected sex and all the other dangers of underage and excessive drinking? Grow up and be a father!!

January 27, 2012 at 11:43 am
(2) Kim says:

Not a good idea….so many things can go wrong from there and you’re reponsible for all.

January 27, 2012 at 12:37 pm
(3) stacy says:

NOT A GOOD IDEA, MY SON WHO IS ONLY 14 HAS ATTENDED A PARTY WHERE BEER WAS EBIGN SERVED, AGAINST MY BETTER JUDGEMENT I LET HIM GO. AFTERWARDS WHEN I PICKED HIM UP AND SAW THAT HE WAS TIPSY I FELT LIKE THE WORST PARENT N EARTH. SINCE THEN I HAVE ADMITTED MY WRONGE JUDGEMENT CALL TO MY SON AND WILL NOT HIM ATTEND ANY PARTIES WHERE THERE WILL BE ALCOHOL SERVED. I WAS TRYING TO BE THE “COOL” MOM BEFORE BUT I REALIZED IT ISN’T WHAT MY CHILD NEEDS, HE NEEDS A MOTHER WHO IS ALWAYS GOING TO PROTECT HIM AND MAKE THE RIGHT DECISIONS FOR HIM, WHEN HE CAN NOT. BESIDES THE LEGAL ASPECT OF IT, I WOULDN’T LET HER HAVE ALCOHOL AT HER PARTY. MY SON RECENTLY ASKED TO HAVE SOME PEOPLE OVER TOO AND ASSUMED I WOUDL ALLOW ALCOHOL I IMMEDIATELY TOLD HIM ABSOLUTELY NOT AND REGARLDESS OF HIS ATTITUDE I STILL INSISTED THAT NO ALCOHOL WOULD BE ALLOWED.

January 27, 2012 at 4:59 pm
(4) Donna says:

My kids are 25 and 15. My son always new i would never offer alcohol to anyone under 21. and now my daughter knows the same. The subject only comes up once, they know i mean it. Its hard enough being a teenager without fogging your Brain anymore.Whats the reason? Give them soda, maybe Mountain Dew, that will give them enough energy!

January 27, 2012 at 10:11 pm
(5) Debbie says:

Dad….I have to say that with your own children…you can let your daughter ‘try a drink’ AT HOME UNDER SUPERVISION.
In our home we have let our minor children sample a glass or wine with dinner, etc. Ithis takes away the ‘mistique’ of it all and shows them that it really doesn’t taste as good as they think…This was the practice in my own home while growing up….there are no ‘alcohol’ problems in the family.
As others have commented, you may NOT ALLOW OTHER MINORS TO DRINK AT YOUR HOME…YOUR DAUGHTER’S BIRTHDAY…OR OTHERWISE. IT IF UNLAWFUL AS WELL AS IMMORAL.
I would instead reassure your daughter (as we did ours at the time) that waiting for that magic ’21st ‘ Birthday is the best course, as well as the RIGHT Course.!!

January 29, 2012 at 2:10 am
(6) Danielle says:

My family allowed some underage drinking with dinner and on spacial accessions. out of us kids who’s parents allowed the under age drinking, some of us have a problem with alcohol and some of us don’t. however u need to also think about how other parents are going to feel. i’m sure you have some strong parenting issues and you wouldn’t want anyone to go agents you even though they are more relaxed about that specific situation. no one wants there parenting to be challenged so if the other parents aren’t ok with drinking maybe it’s not such a good idea. i’d suggest talking to the other parents first just out of respect and as a moral obligation.that’s what you would want too right… respect for your parenting. also remember everyone is different, also another reason to consult parents first.

April 27, 2012 at 9:51 am
(7) billoe says:

Dad….u said itself u had an issue with alcohol. This predisposed ur child to have a much higher risk for having a problem with alcohol as well. Is this what u want for ur kids? Not to mention that there is a reason the legal drinking age is 21 in most states. Because the child’s body and brain is not fully developed till then. It is a way of protecting our young adults! These parents that think oh is rather have them do it in front of me than behind my back, well really that’s just stupid because u r setting a bad example for ur kid and setting them up to have a lifelong nightmare of becoming alcoholics etc….smarten up people.

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