He had never held a job before, and his search ran up against the economic crunch. However, it's been 8 months now, and I think that's more than enough time to find a McDonald's job or something like that.
I'll be talking to him tomorrow, as I asked him to think about his future plans and told him I need to plan my own finances. I've asked him to start pay $225 a month toward household finances, a modest amount, starting on May 20. He got a job briefly, but it ended up just being an on-call weekend only thing and has not worked out. My mom has told him he needs to get serious and take action. I've told him the same, though I've been more lenient.
Anyway... I think it's perfectly reasoned and fine to tell him that I expect him to have a job within 4 to 6 weeks and that if not, I can no longer support him. Perhaps he'll need to go home, or beg to stay with his grandparents, but a 19-year-old man not in school, with no job, is not something I can support.
I plan to say what I need to say factually and without anger, and I will follow up with him with it written down in email, but I believe I simply have to be firm. Wondering if you have experience or have heard of situations like these?
Denise's thoughts: I've been in similar experiences. Here is how I handled them: Since having a job is not something in his total control, I would put my stipulations on things that are in his total control. Filling out 5-10 applications a week and making 2-5 call-backs a week, starting the second week. That is actively looking for a job.
If he was unwilling to do that, I would send him home to mom.
Asking our parenting community: How have your motivated your teen to get a job? Please share your thoughts, opinions and advice in the comments area.