Order, loving relationship and adolescent...all in the same sentence? Parents of today’s teenagers surrounded by today’s problems...does this sound impossible to you? It doesn’t have to be. Gregory Bodenhamer, formerly a juvenile probation officer, is the cofounder and director of the Back in Control Center in Portland, Oregon, an organization devoted to teaching parents of pre-teens and teenagers how to change their children’s out-of-control behaviors by taking back control.

In "Parent in Control," Gregory Bodenhamer shares with parents and others who deal with difficult children, practical uncomplicated techniques on which the Back in Control program is based. Though written with adolescents prone to the worst of behaviors in mind, the principals presented are sound in dealing with even small problem behaviors. Of course the sooner ground rules and boundaries are established and deviant behaviors are identified and stopped the better but as expressed in the very writing of this book...it is never too late for the parent of an out-of-control adolescent to work on regaining control.

This book is fast concise reading, can be put into practice immediately, yields positive results as short as within a few weeks and is easy to refer back to for a refresher. He apologizes at the outset to those who may find the explicit 'street language' of the illustrative dialogues offensive, though I suspect many of us have encountered such language out of the mouths of our babes. The situations themselves may make uncomfortable reading for some. However the information and skills to be gained are well worth the vile reminder of reality.

Gregory Bodenhamer is not subtle about pointing out the flaws in the various ways many parents handle situations with their adolescents, unwittingly enabling the very behaviors they are trying so hard to eliminate, from everyday frustrations such as provoking arguments to potentially life-threatening choices like hanging out with drug users. We are shown through the real-life scenarios that often, contrary to what the parent believes, the teen is in fact the one in control. The revelations may be difficult to swallow at times, after all he speaks to the heart and emotions of many of us, but upon closer examination of our own disciplinary styles and the results we have been receiving, we can find that he makes very good sense.

Parents are given specific more effective ways to speak to their teens as well as practical actions to take in various situations, including dealing with skipping school, drug use and violence which puts the parents in control for the benefit of their teens, getting them back on track. Along with the parent regaining control, comes the added benefit of a mutually respectful and loving relationship with their teen. Some may even find, as I did, that once the parent gains control over a particular aspect of a teen’s misbehavior, other problem behaviors begin to settle down on their own.

"Parent in Control" has been very helpful to my family and others I have recommended it to. No method can be one size fits all but for parents who are willing to give Gregory Bodenhamer’s techniques and guidelines full effort and determination, you could soon be bringing your adolescents’ out-of-control behaviors back in control and enjoying the order and loving relationships that follow. I am grateful to have found "Parent in Control" and I now pass it on to you.