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How To Talk to a Teen with ‘Looking for a Date’ Jitters


Quick Links: Teen Dating Quiz: Are they friends or are they dating? | When should teens start dating? | Teen Breakups

If your teen gets nervous about asking someone out on a date, know that he/she is not alone. Many, if not most, teens have anxious feelings when they think about opening themselves up for rejection as that can be a blow to their self-esteem. But that is no reason not to try. Here is how to encourage your teen to ask someone on a date, even when he/she has the ‘looking for a date’ jitters.

Time Required: on-going

Here's How:

  1. Remember to keep your emotions in check. Do not get too excited or worried. Take a deep breath and think of yourself as a life coach.

  2. Using appropriate interest, ask your teen about the person he/she wants to ask on a date.

  3. Assess where your teen would like to go on the date. Is it out to the movies or to the prom? Different situations would call for different strategies.

  4. Role-play the situation. Offer your teen suggestions, but allow your teen to decide what he/she is comfortable doing and/or saying.

  5. Ask your teen what he/she would say if the person says no? What if the perspective date says yes? Offer suggestions if your teen isn’t able to think of any.


  1. If your teen is looking for a date for a big event, like the prom, he/she may be even more nervous. Ask if going as a group with some friends may be an alternative or asking someone for just a friendly date. Going together as friends can take the edge off.

  2. This is good time to talk to your teen about how to respond when someone asks him/her out on a date. Talk about polite ways to let someone down too.

  3. Quick Links:

  4. Parenting Quizzes for Parents of Teens

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