Teens should be allowed to date..
- Parents want certain things for their child. They want them to get a good education, make real friends (childhood bonds are very important), learn to socialize and of course enjoy being a kid. Many adults have the misguided opinion that dating should begin when their child is 20! This is not true! Dating helps teens to get to know someone they may possibly be interested in having a relationship with. As teen develops so will their needs and the people they're attracted to will be more mature. Insisting that your child waits until they're 20 (or older) to date has two disadvantages. Firstly you can't keep as close an eye on a 20 year old as you can a 16 year old. This will lead to a 20 year old who doesn't know how to socialize correctly and who may fall in love with their fist love and end up pregnant with a baby before they have had a proper chance to enjoy young-adulthood. Secondly, no one wants to date a 20 year old who is shy/inexperienced. So let your kids date!!!
- —Guest 16 && Not allowed to date
Strict Parent
- My father died when I was 3 and left my mother to raise 6 kids by herself. My four brothers where allowed to date numerous girls while my sister(8yrs older) and I were forbidden to date anyone. We weren't allowed to even mention boys or ask anything about sex what so ever!!My sister was 22 before she had her first boyfriend, I left after graduation because of how strict it was and fell in love with the first boy I dated. We'll I married him, had children and lived a life of complete hell until I had the courage to leave him. My mother did the best she could but sheltered me so much that it hurt me when I entered the real world. I have two daughters of my own 22 and 16. My 16yr old started dating and we keep open lines of communication and set boundaries that we both can live with. I will not repeat my mothers cycle with my own daughters. Let your children experience life just be involved.
- —newhouse17
Never.
- Why is it so socially acceptable to date? All it does is reduce the institution of marriage to a set of legal papers (papers that can be easily torn up), and it psychologically and emotionally hurts our children. Especially our girls. They take it to heart while many of our young men approach it from a very shallow angle. Taking away true and wholesome responsibility from a relationship is seen by females as the easy way to satisfy their desire for attention and by males as the easy way to satisfy their sexual desire. And all it's doing is permanently damaging our kids. Educate your children on why dating will hurt them more than help them. Tell them not to worry about relationships until they're ready to get married- until someone is really willing to commit their lives to them.
- —Guest A teen
11 YO dating
- My 11 yo daughter was asked out by a boy in a grade above her. She looks more like a 15 yo as I did at her age. Her step dad and I have told her no boyfriends until much later and we will discuss group dating after she is 15/16. We are being pretty adamant about this and will go with spending more time with her and encouraging her to invite her friends over who are not so into boys yet. We are very religious and want her to care about her own personal needs (academics and friends). We have told her to concentrate on herself and enjoy her activities. Hopefully we can continue to help her grow into an independent and strong young woman which maintaining healthy parental relationships. We are not terribly restrictive but this is one area where we are not willing to compromise.
- —thewalterfamily2002
Let them date!
- Be supportive of your kids. They're going to have feelings about a special someone during those awkward teenage years. Have boundaries for them like: they need to come home at curfew, you need to meet their date before they leave, no one-on-one dates until they're -- years old, keep your GPA above -.--. Yes, be a parent, but also realize these kids are going to be adults soon. Dating is like learning how to ride a bike. Teenage dating is like riding with training wheels and you ARE the training wheels. It's your job as a parent to answer questions, ask questions, trust them, and support them. Keep an open line of communication, and be willing to make reasonable negotiations with them. These teens are figuring themselves out, let them!
- —Guest 22 year old woman
Depends What Your Talking About.
- I think that there's really two different things of dating for kids. A lot of kids will "date"when there 11 or 12, it is not really dating its just talking in school, eating lunch together and maybe going to family events with the person and maybe hangout with supervision from parents. At that age that's fine, no harm done. I don't think kids should actually date were they go out on dates and go to things together until they are 14.
- —Guest logan
Young Teens
- I told my son he could date at 15 as long as he is with a group I know or at home. He can't wait! lol
- —Guest yung
Whenever
- Growing up there were no rules for when we could date. My brothers and sister started dating when they were in middle school, but I never dated mainly because no one ever approached me and I was just too shy to ask someone else out. Now my brothers and sister all have kids and I have still yet to date. I don't think you should put an age limit on dating. If two people like each other and have the courage to ask each other out than I think that they are surly old enough to date.
- —Guest Solomon
It gets intense, fast.
- I have read all of these posts and am happy to see others like me out there. My daughter is a sophmore (15 and a half) - she "dated" one other guy last year - consisted of a family outing and a movie night at our house - and he broke her heart. She has wanted a "relationship" for a long time and now has a steady boyfriend. He is 15 also. he comes from a different background - lives with his mother - left alone a lot - kind of a lonely life but seems to be a nice kid. They seem to really like each other but I get the sense from texts and convos with my daughter that he is very physically attracted to her and will take as much as she is willing to give. This worries me because although I know my daughter is a good girl - mature, high honors student great athlete - she REALLY likes him and when u like someone u want to please them and make it so that they wont go away.
- —Guest scared mom of 15 year old "in love"
What is dating for?
- Dating is the alternative to arranged marriages. So if you are not in the market to get married anytime soon there is no good reason to be dating. One thing leads to another, it always has and probably, as we are human, always will. It is a responsibility just like driving a car. Just because you reach a certain age does not mean you are ready for it. My only child, a daughter, is now 12 and has been dating behind my back for 2 months and her grades have suffered. Phone taken away, teachers aware and extra chores. Lying was the first offense. Letting a boy distract you from your education was the 2nd offense. Tough job being a parent.
- —Guest Elora's Mom
10th Grade
- My daughter is getting married this June. She has been dating this boy since 10 grade through college and getting her masters degree. I think you should let your teen date starting in 10 grade.
- —Guest jack
I'm 14-and Grounded
- So the golden rule of my family? No dating until college. I understood and I know that going behind anyone's back is bad, but I ended up dating this guy. He takes A.P classes, is in Jazz, Guitar, and Band club, and extremely sweet. I know how boys are, and he's the type of guy you want to SHOW to your parents. So in conclusion, depending on how mature your kid is, let 'em date. Trust is a virtue!
- —Guest Ashley
Dating.........Y/N
- I think the age that a child begins to date is completely dependent on their maturity. Also, if they are doing other inappropriate things, like smoking, they can't be trusted with a girl or boy behind closed doors. My mother asked me when I was 11 what I thought a good age would be to start dating. I answered 11 and she laughed. She was set on 15 but when I turned 14 and got a boyfriend, she was totally fine with it. I have been with him for 9 years and we have one baby girl. My first love turned out to be the one. But anyways, trust your children because they might be just like me and have a great love sense. If they start getting too involved to fast, tell your child to slow down and tell them that if their partner really loves them, then they will wait. My husband waited 4 1/2 years for me!
- —Guest truthful
Did you know how young kids are dating?
- I am 13 and my mother has told me everything I need to know, she told me I will not start dating until I am 14. In a year, I'm pretty happy. My friend and all of her friends started dating at 11; which made me start to die inside from jealousy. My mom could see me having a boy friend just to hang out with and stuff. I brought up the idea makeing out or whatever too. She was sooo serious... "No, if I eeevvvveeerrrr catch you two making out I'd kill him then you!" Just joking but she would be pissed. Also I have one friend, the best ever! I am homeschooled; so it will be verrrrryyyyy hard for me to find a boyfriend.
- —Guest DeAnna
Dating for Marrige
- teenagers now use the word 'love so loosely. They say they are in 'love' with someone that they just met. But in truth its rarely 'love' rather it is normally LUST. As a teenager you should not be thinking about marriage, so why would you date? Many people use the excuse of experience. 'My child needs the experience of dating, so they know what to do.' Sorry, but that is the stupidest excuse ever. If you use that excuse, then you are essentially saying that you are also OK with teen sex, since they need the experience to know what to do in the future. Are you getting my point? Some things are made to be experienced at a certain time. Thus, I believe that when you make the decision to date, you should date to marry that individual. Dating is not something to try for fun, it serves the purpose of helping you get to know the individual that you are going to spend your life with.
- —Guest
