1. Parenting

Getting Teen Daughter to Stop Sexting

By June 10, 2011

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A parent on the forum seeks advice: We recently learned that our 16 year old daughter has been sexting-extreme. We took her texting away, review all in and out phone calls. Her laptop has been returned to the store and we have installed software in both computers at home. However if she goes to a friends, family and has access to the internet she does it. We can't watch her 24/7 and kept talking to her about the danger. We know that she was naked with more than one of her "chat" friends. Her friends introduced her to these chat rooms. One of her friend also told her how to bypass a time limit we have set on our computer. We have address that problem. Hate to say but she changed friends and now she is a different person. We are taking her to get counseling. Whatever advise we can get to handle this would be most appreciative.

Denise's thoughts: Sorry you are going through this, and I don't want to sound trite, but you seem to be doing all you can. She needs the counseling - it is good that you recognized that. At this point you'll need to use all the patience you can muster to allow what you are doing time to work.

One thing you can try to do during that time is to strengthen your relationship with her. Be sure to tell her - make it very clear - that you are there for her. You are both on the same side. Maybe start some conversations about good things that are in her future. Visit a college or two? Her problems are in the here and now. Maybe by focusing on how things can be better for her future, it will help make things better now. Setting goals often helps people focus on obtaining them.

Related Resources: Asking our community: Is there anything more that you think this parent can do? Please share your thoughts, experiences and advice in our comments area.
June 10, 2011 at 12:51 pm
(1) Parent now says:

I used to be a crazy teen that my parents couldn’t quite control. Now that I’m a parent, I think about what would have helped control my behavior.

Never give up on your teen. No matter how hard they are opposing you and all the house rules, stick to your guns. Do not treat them as if they have failed you. Show them the path and hopefully they get on it.

Show them unconditional love no matter how much you are upset with them.

Discipline with love not anger.

Don’t keep telling them what you don’t want them to do. Instead, explain why these actions don’t benefit them.

I’m sure the teen is left feeling guilty after she’s engaged in these acts. Explain that any action that leaves you with guilt is a sign that it wasn’t something you feel right with .

Good luck to all parents out there with teens

June 10, 2011 at 1:17 pm
(2) Denise Guide to Parenting Teens says:

“Show them unconditional love no matter how much you are upset with them.” Excellent advice.

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