Alcoholism and drug addiction are taking a toll on the American family. The people hurt most by drugs and alcohol don't even use them; they are the children of alcoholics and other drug-dependent parents. As a result, 8.3 million children in the United States, approximately 11 percent, live with at least one parent who is in need of treatment for alcohol or drug dependency. One in four children under the age of 18 is living in a home where alcoholism or alcohol abuse is a fact of daily life.
February 9-15, 2003, has been designated National Children of Alcoholics Week. This week is a time to educate the public and raise awareness about the hardships suffered by children living in households with one or more parents who drink.
Here are some facts that you may not know about children of alcoholics:
- They are more likely to be victims of abuse or to witness domestic violence.
- They are more likely than other children to begin drinking during adolescence.
- They may suffer from the effects of fetal alcohol syndrome (FAS) or fetal alcohol exposure (FAE) due to alcohol use during pregnancy.
- They are more likely to experience mental health problems—depression, anxiety, behavioral disorders, and lower self-esteem—in childhood, adolescence, and young adulthood.
- They have more difficulties in school.
- They often blame themselves for their parent’s drinking and related behavior.
[h2]How You Can Help[/h2] Most adults can support children of alcoholics (COAs) in three ways. First, you can provide children with age-appropriate information about alcohol, drugs, and the disease of addiction. The most important messages for COAs to hear from trusted adults are:
Alcohol/drug dependency is an illness. It is not your fault that your parent drinks too much or uses drugs, and you are not responsible for correcting it.
You can take care of yourself by talking with a trusted person and making healthy choices in your own life.
Treatment for alcohol/drug dependency is available and can be effective in getting a parent with addiction on the road to recovery.
You are not alone. You need and deserve services. There are safe people who can help you. Second, you can teach children how to identify and express their feelings in healthy ways, especially by seeking out and speaking with "safe" adults. You can guide them toward educational support programs at school or in your community. Such programs can help them develop coping skills to deepen their innermost strength and resilience.
Third, and perhaps most important, you can take the time to develop a healthy adult/child relationship with a COA who needs you. Children who live in alcohol- and drug-dependent families learn not to trust adults. By offering your time and an open ear to provide assurance and validation, you can counteract much of that mistrust and make an immeasurable and positive impact on a child's life.
If you are in a position to influence the adults in the family, help them find a qualified professional who is experienced with intervention and can help them get the assessment and treatment they need to begin recovery. An actual family intervention should be undertaken only with a qualified professional who is experienced in the intervention process.
