Your teen didn’t choose this sexual orientation. According to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry Facts for Families # 63: ‘a person's sexual orientation is not a matter of choice. In other words, individuals have no more choice about being homosexual or bisexual than heterosexual.’
It took a lot of courage for your teen to choose to tell you and come out. Somewhere along the lines, you have contributed to raising a teenager with enough self-esteem to face you with a problem that he/she knew could hurt you. Many teens choose the alternatives, which are deep depression and suicide. You did something right and you need to continue doing so.
Your teen felt the need to make you an important part of his/her future. He/She wants you as part of his/her life or you wouldn’t have been told.
You are a bump in your teen’s road to the future. While your teen being gay, lesbian or bisexual may bust all of your preconceived conceptions of your teen’s future, you will need to stop dealing with those issues in front of your teen. Your road to acceptance could be bumpy. But your teen’s road is bumpier and he/she needs your help. Don’t make the bump you’ve created impassable.
You need to remember your love for your teen. Although it may take time for you to accept your teen’s sexual orientation, it should not take any time for you to accept that you love your teen. If you express your love for your teen frequently while you are moving towards acceptance you will strengthen the foundation of your relationship and create more room for it to grow as he/she becomes an adult.
Parenting Poll: Do you talk to your teen about sex and his/her sexuality?
